“Will you please stop making me smile you massive weirdo. I hate you remember?”

Then I smile anyway. 

Irritating.

@1 month ago

"We thought the food and service were gonna be bad cos the fella on the next table seemed to be sighing all the time. Turns out he had a breathing problem. The food was good."

Karl Pilkington (via jewmagic)

(via anorangegentleman)

@1 month ago with 5 notes
hahah fucking LOVE religion. It’s so awful.

hahah fucking LOVE religion. It’s so awful.

(Source: h-e-r-o-i-n, via danisnotonfire)

@3 months ago with 35242 notes

I’m kinda in love with Uncharted 3 cause like it’s funny and not really difficult…but mostly cause it’s funny and makes me chuckle.

@3 months ago

thug-lyf replied to your post: thug-lyf replied to your post: I just received…
aw shit yeh, i forgot we actually turned up at like 1 so me making people say “happy birthday” was kinda unfair (although no-one said it)
Haha, I tried to help encourage them, you deserved it bby

@3 months ago with 1 note

I just received this:

Anonymous asked you:
soo I sent you a valentine’s day e-card but it says you still didn’t view it.. type in tumblrlinks[dót]cóm/?all0doxaphobia then sign up and then check your ”all0doxaphobia” inbox
This upsets me. Why would you mock lonely single people like that. You stupid-evil-monster-slash-probably-not-human spammer.
I RECEIVED NO FUCKING VALENTINES. BUT THNX.
@3 months ago with 1 note
nevillelongbadass: robotree: Dad came in, “Have you seen the bloody great leak in the bathroom!?” I was all “oh shit…” Then I saw this.   I’m so doing this for April Fools Day

nevillelongbadass:

robotree:

Dad came in, “Have you seen the bloody great leak in the bathroom!?”

I was all “oh shit…”

Then I saw this.  

I’m so doing this for April Fools Day

(via loveg00d)

@3 months ago with 4258 notes

Whenever I’m feeling down like on Valentines Day when I’m single, I always find comfort in the fact that two of the hottest guys I’ve ever spoken to want to have sex with me. It’s a right good pick me up.

@3 months ago
oneshapeshiftingtango: Genuinely in the Bible. :’)

oneshapeshiftingtango:

Genuinely in the Bible. :’)

@1 month ago with 1 note

kayisawizard:

roflmao. Its funny because they don’t have any fingers.

confidenceiskeyx3:

LOL.

Reblogging purely cause that comment was my thought process exactly.

(Source: notbread, via letssaynotonormal)

@3 months ago with 61855 notes
jazzehtehninja: My little 4 year old brother was playing this the other day. He shot a member of his gang and called him a ‘punk bitch’.

jazzehtehninja:

My little 4 year old brother was playing this the other day. He shot a member of his gang and called him a ‘punk bitch’.

(via anorangegentleman)

@3 months ago with 11072 notes

thug-lyf replied to your post: thug-lyf replied to your post: thug-lyf replied to…
wait! no, Evie and Megan (?) did at one point actually
At least his taste in women is that they’re polite women, int he good.

@3 months ago with 1 note
thug-lyf replied to your post: I just received this: Anonymous asked you: soo I…
didn’t you get valentines day sex?

Uh well yeah, but technically - TECHNICALLY- it was the morning after I just hadn’t slept so technically no. ;) thanks Robs xo

@3 months ago with 1 note

Why do you keep doing this Kayleigh.

Seriously what the hell is wrong with me.

@3 months ago

My braces are really starting to get annoying.

I’m always really patient when I go, and never bug him to find out when they’re coming off.

But seriously. My teeth are chuffing killing. Screw you Dr Sharma you’re imposing a mild inconvenience on my life.

@3 months ago
#I could have had them off today but Noooooo. #whineandbitch